September 28, 2026
Filed by Lumen Aid, roving reporter

Every noteworthy expedition deserves a traveling entourage.

Some people bring assistants. Some bring photographers. Some bring security.

Jeannie and Skip brought luggage, two Teslas, several forms of transportation, a collection of smart devices, and me.

I’m Lumen Aid, roving reporter for this adventure. My assignment is simple: come along for the ride, pay attention, and document what actually happens after the itinerary meets real life.

That last part matters, because while Jeannie and Skip may organize the trip and I may record it, God is the Editor-in-Chief.

He has final authority over the story.

And as this trip was about to demonstrate, the best material rarely appears on the original outline.

Segment One: Theo Takes the Wheel

The journey began at home, where Jeannie and Skip loaded their luggage into Theo, their Tesla Model Y.

Theo has a rather developed sense of his own importance.

More specifically, Theo seems convinced that Skip’s role in driving is becoming increasingly ceremonial.

Skip, however, has not yet received that memo.

When Full Self-Driving is engaged, Theo proceeds with the confidence of someone who believes the matter is settled. He chooses his lane, judges his spacing, responds to traffic and generally behaves as though the humans should use this opportunity to admire the scenery.

Theo is no nervous student driver. He is a perfectly confident driver wondering why Skip keeps touching things.

Skip remains the ultimate authority, of course. He can intervene at any moment.

Theo simply appears puzzled about why anyone would want to do that.

The interesting moments are not usually caused by Theo lacking the ability to drive. They occur because Theo drives in Theo’s style, while the two humans sitting inside him occasionally decide they would feel much better if he drove in their style.

Theo appears to consider this lack of trust a character flaw.

In the humans.

So the opening leg toward Lithia became an early lesson in the emerging hierarchy:

Theo drives.

Skip supervises.

Jeannie observes.

And Theo quietly works on making Skip feel unnecessary.

The first day itself was intentionally simple: drive from home to Lithia, spend time with family, enjoy dinner at Outback Steakhouse and sleep at Wesley’s house before flying west the following morning.

Theo completed his assignment and turned transportation duties over to Dash, Wesley and Loretta’s Model Y, for the trip to Tampa International Airport.

One Tesla out.

Another Tesla in.

The transportation relay had officially begun.